Morphing Into My Mom

I guess there is no denying it anymore, I think I am morphing into my mom....it's taken me long enough...or maybe it's taken me this long to admit it.

I never thought we looked alike...after all I am so much taller...but as time goes by I am realizing I am just a taller version of her.

We are different in so many ways....and in many ways the same. I can't tell you how often I will make a comment to someone...and it's like I hear my mother talking....it's happening everyday...it's funny and scary at the same time! Even some of our mannerisms are the same.

I am okay with all of this...really! In the past a comment from someone saying I was just like my mom would ruffle my feathers....but how can I deny it when I continue to hear her in me everyday.

My mom is almost eighty one, been married to my dad almost fifty eight years. She is fiercely independent, still works, drives and belongs to a singing group that "tours" the local nursing homes where she lives. She's my mom and I love her....and I am becoming more and more like her everyday.

Can You Relate?

"One reason we are so harried and hurried is that we make yesterday and tomorrow our business, when all that legitimately concerns us is today. If we really have too much to do, there are items on the agenda which God did not put there. Let us submit the list to Him and ask Him to indicate which items we must delete. There is always time to do the will of God. If we are too busy to do that, we are too busy"       Elizabeth Elliot...... Secure In His Everlasting Arms

Thankful

I know to the untrained eye this looks like a dandelion, just an ordinary weed but to a gardener, it represents spring. Have I mentioned spring is my favorite time of the year? I start looking around the garden in February looking for signs of life but usually don't find much happening until the middle of March....this has been a different year. We have candy tuft blooming, tulips and daffodils popping out of the ground and begonias that never really died over the winter. The temptation is to get out there and start digging but I know that the cold weather is not done yet so I am going to resist. I can still satisfy my need to get my hands dirty by starting some seeds indoors, maybe some tomatoes, herbs or flowers, I have lots of leftover seed from last year

Things to be thankful for today

• Beautiful warm sunny day
• A day with no real agenda...no worries I will find ways to fill it
• Son made it back to school safely...he had to turn around and go back to the next day
• Planned lunch with my husband...we usually meet weekly for lunch
• Improving health issues...everyday I am feeling more like my "old" self. Blood pressure which has been an issue since before Christmas finally under control
• For Sweet Lady's good response to her new medication, it does not appear to have effected her adversely in anyway. She continues happy and content and was able to go out with the "lunch bunch" the other day. I was concerned that because she had a seizure she would be restricted from going on the outings...not the case
• For a surprise visit from a friend this morning...call me crazy but I don't mind surprise visits, she did give me warning, she texted me a few minutes before she arrived to make sure it was okay.
• For another day...another year
• For God's constant reminder of his care for me, I see it everywhere.

Happy Birthday to My Sweet Husband

My husbands favorite little people helping him celebrate his birthday

I had a hard time finding a card this year, it was a milestone birthday and nothing seemed appropriate. The cards were all too generic, silly or better left unopened, so for the first time ever, I did not get my husband a birthday card. 

What I wanted to say that no card seemed to convey was, that he has touched many lives in 60 years, and is a wonderful example and encouragement to others. Life has not always gone as he would have thought, we have had some serious bumps in the road, yet he has remained steadfast in his faith knowing God always had a plan. His love for family melts my heart and he is a perfect balance to my more reserved personality....God knew just what I needed

He made a comment the other day about how cool it was that God keeps showing us new things, aren't you glad God doesn't look at advancing age as a disqualification

The righteous will flourish like a palm tree, they will grow like a cedar of Lebanon; planted in the house of the Lord, they will flourish in the courts of our God. They will bear fruit in old age, they will stay fresh and green   Psalm 92:12-14

The rescheduled birthday party was Saturday. One nice little surprise that occurred because of the date change was that my youngest son was able to attend. He wanted to surprise his dad so mum was the word, no one knew he was trying to come except me. It was touching to watch my husbands surprise when my son tapped him on the shoulder and he turned around and realized who it was (my son lives 4 hours away)

We were blessed with a wonderful time with family and friends. Many folks wrote words of encouragement and scripture, all to be assembled into some type of book to remember the event but I think one of his favorite things that he recieved was a bag of toys from the grandchildren. They know he will be there ready to play the next time they come to visit

Happy Birthday to my Sweet Husband

This was DIL idea, she did a great job

Our surprise guest

Picture of oldest son with husband sent to us by a friend to include in the book, love it

It's The Simple Things That Make Me Smile

I heard him before I saw him,  I had let our dog out and because I am a multitasker I decided to pull some chickweed while I waited for him to come back

I kept hearing this tapping sound, but I was intent on pulling weeds, eventually the "light bulb" went off and I realized I should check out what was making the noise. I took a closer look in the trees around the house and spotted this little guy. He was quite intent on pecking a hole in this tree and was not at all deterred by my presence. He even waited for me to go inside and get my camera.

It doesn't take much to make me smile, sometimes it's the simple things that give me the most pleasure. Thanking the Lord for this little glimpse of a Downing Woodpecker today.

A Dose of Truth

I am reading a new devotional book by Nancy Guthrie called the One Year book of Hope.

Today's reading was titled "Telling Yourself the Truth" When I struggle with doubts or fears or just life in general... I need truth... not my version of truth, not the worlds version of truth but God's truth.

"Truth soothes our fears, changes our feelings and shapes our thoughts"

Some helpful truths I read today

You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways  Psalm139:3

for all my ways are known to you Psalm 119:168b

He knows me, he knows my weaknesses...when I think about someone who knows me well it would be my husband...but God knows me even better than him..there is no hiding who I really am from God...he already knows...I find that comforting

If I rise on the wings of dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your right hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast  Psalm 139:9-10

No matter where I am or what I am going through He is there, guiding me, holding me fast

You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you  Isaiah 26:3

There is peace avaliable when I focus on His truths..must reorient my thinking once again

Life Challenges

The last couple of days have been challenging to say the least. I was amazing to see how quickly I could go from faith to frustration, from trusting God to questioning Him.  Every time I thought there was a plan it changed,  I like to have a plan even if it's not my plan....God wants me to stop trying to control things and trust Him...you would think I would get this already! I know it's a process

Control...it's an illusion...we don't have control over anything.

The good news is that Sweet Lady is safely home, discharged from the hospital today. She was anxious to get home and we were thrilled to get her out of the hospital We don't know what caused her seizures and may never know.

There has been evidences of God's grace...there always is if you look

• Sweet Lady did well in the hospital, the stay did not increase her confusion and she stayed safe, one of my prayers was that she would not fall
• She is back to her previous functional level, walked right back into the facility, said hello to everyone and told them she was glad to be home, no ambulance ride needed to get back

I am hoping that Sweet Lady settles back in quickly...but I realize things could change again.
Husband and I have talked about the last couple of days and all that has happened with his sister. Although Sweet Lady was the one directly effected, this event was also about us...God used it to show us things that still reside in the depths of our hearts....faithful to refine

When Plans Fall Apart

How do you respond when things don't go according to plan? I would like to think that the Lord has grown me in this area but I can assure you there is plenty of growing left to do.

Take this week for example, the last couple of days,  have not gone according to plan...not even a little bit. Sweet Lady had been having some testing done in preparation for a much anticipated appointment with her neurologist. The office had called us twice this week to emphasize how important it was for us to keep this appointment. (and to schedule yet one more test before the appointment) We were set, everything was ready to go.....then it wasn't.

Total change in plans, Sweet Lady was hospitalized, so missed the appointment, the doctor she was to see doesn't have admitting privileges where she is at, all the tests to be redone, we are starting from scratch...including new doctor (one that does have admitting privileges at this hospital).... to say I was frustrated and discouraged was an understatement, then I read this today

"From our limited vantage point, our lives are marked by an endless series of contingencies. We frequently find ourselves instead of acting as we planned, reacting to an unexpected turn of events. We make plans but are often forced to change those plans. But there are no contingencies with God. Our unexpected forced change of plans is part of his plan. God is never surprised; never caught off guard; never frustrated by unexpected developments. God does as he pleases, and that which pleases Him is always for His glory and our good"....  Trusting God by Jerry Bridges

I have read this book before but I had decided to pick it up again last week...talk about timing...just what I needed when I needed it. Things are better, the frustration and discouragement are gone. God instead has given me peace.

What Are You Communicating?

I saw this young man in a wheelchair, he was in his teens. The family was standing in line in front of us. The young mans body was frail, spastic as the dad transferred him from his chair. I was struck by the tenderness of the teenage sister as she comforted him, trying to reduce his anxiety, putting his needs over her own.

I don't know that family, I have no idea if they were believers but they made an impression on me. God often uses the everyday things to speak to my heart and he did as I watched this family...my first thought..I need to ask the Lord to forgive me for my complaining...I can complain about the most ridiculous things... my other thought..... people are always watching whether we know it or not.

A Glimpse of Things to Come?

One of my biggest challenges is my memory, I seem to forget the simplest things.

I am not particularly worried, I noticed a direct correlation to my forgetfulness after starting on Arimidex. Arimidex is a drug they use to prevent your body from making estrogen,  I take it to prevent breast cancer reoccurance, apparently estrogen helps you think more clearly, thus the problem!

It is frustrating at times I will admit, but I have found that the best way of approaching this is to relax, go along for the ride and don't take yourself too seriously

Some of the things that happened this week.

I spent a day looking for a book I always keep downstairs, I had forgotten my grand daughter had taken it upstairs to read. I looked for that book for an entire day.

We had been gone a couple of days and had a lot of mail to sort through, when it came time to pay the mortgage I could not remember where I had put it

We had left my SIL's ID card for my children in case anything came up while we were gone...in this case my husband joined in the fun...neither one of us could remember where the card was

Yesterday I decided to include my family and friends in the fun. My husband is getting ready to celebrate a milestone birthday. We decided we would have a party, menu was planned, date and time was picked and emails were sent.

I got my first indication that there might be a problem after a text from a friend about the birthday celebration...when exactly was it going to be?

You guessed it, I included everything in that email but the date and time. Give me much grace Lord!

Change Can Be Good

Back in January I had decided to pick a "formal" Bible reading plan. Never done one in the past, I am not a very structured person, my previous routine was to follow along with an audio reading, or I would study a particular book of the bible or sometimes I would just read at random.

The beginning of the year we were encouraged to pick a bible reading plan. I found a devotional from D.A.Carson, For the Love of God, it followed the M'Cheyne daily reading plan...the goal was to read the bible in a year. Well its been a month, time to evaluate how its going.

I have found that I probably need a five year plan. The devotional is good, but there are times when I feel like I would like to linger in a certain section for a while and other times, I would like to continue reading on to finish a section. The plan is not working for me...does that surprise anyone who knows me well?

I will continue to use the DA Carson devotional, but only as a guide. I want the freedom to go at my own pace and if I want to veer off in another section of the bible for whatever reason I want to feel like I can do that.  I still enjoy listening and following along to an audio version of the Bible, so will probably do that some days... Oh and there are some studies I want to do... just going to trust the Lord to direct me each day.

Your testimonies are wonderful; therefore my souls keeps them. The unfolding of your words gives light; it imparts understanding to the simple  Psalm 119:129-130