Season of Change

When it first started I didn't think our season of change would last so long. It started when my husband lost his father and our grandchildren moved away. Each event impacted us in a different way.We grieved the loss of the closeness of the grands and felt the added responsibility of keeping closer tabs on my husbands mom. Now that she is gone, there are different responsibilities and EMOTIONS that wash over me like wave after wave, I'm often caught by surprise.

In the midst of all of this, my parents health has been failing. My dad has had two significant events in the last six months, the last one happened just a day after my mother in law passed away. Life has changed for them, which means life has changed for us. I want to fix it but can't. 

When I look at the situations around me it is easy for me to get anxious, to despair, to be depressed or to even get angry. Thats what happens when I focus on the here and now. Some days I'm so bombarded by events that it's hard to focus on anything else. We need to keep our focus on things eternal.

I don't believe there are random events in this life. I believe the Lord orchestrates everything. I believe he is sovereign. I believe he is good and that he uses all things for those that believe and are called for his good purposes. Seasons of change are so hard but I am continuing to learn to trust him. He has proven himself faithful again and again, he will be this time as well.

The comfort of holding a child

Happy days at the Garden

Our Treasures

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth where moths and vermin destroy and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also
Matthew 6:19-21

We have been clearing out the clutter in our home for over a year now. Bit by bit we have been emptying drawers and closets, clearing out stuff that had accumulated over the years. Things that had a purpose in past years but now is no longer used. I'm nor sure it's our age or the "season" we are in but I have felt the need to minimize our "stuff". It's been a slow process, frequently interrupted by life events.

My friend moved last summer and as she was packing, she told me how amazed she was over all the "stuff" she had accumulated and a little convicted about everything they had accumulated over the years. I can surely identify, where was I storing MY treasure and why do I hang on to the things that I do?

We have been steadily cleaning things out, and have piles of things ready for donation. Our youngest even helped by going through some of his belongings over the holidays. We still have a long ways to go, a fact that was only too apparent following a trip to make my in laws house secure.

Talk about a situation that demonstrated a scripture. We were at the house to change the locks so thieves would not steal these earthly treasures. It was a stark reminder to me at how unimportant these "things" are we put value in are, they are gone now. On the other hand it all represented a flood of memories.

I don't think there is anything inherently wrong with having things, that's not at all what I am saying. It is a heart attitude, we must be good stewards to what the Lord has given us and invest in things that have eternal value. One  day we will leave all these things on earth behind.

Oh to remember to invest in things that are eternal.

A Look Back

As expected the last few days have been a little hectic. I actually broke down and stopped using my *paper* Day Planner and went electronic, I couldn't keep up and I never seemed to have the Planner with me when I needed to make an appointment. I've been fighting going electronic for for a couple of years now because I didn't want to learn how to do it on my phone, but I found I had no choice, if I wanted to keep things straight

My *Dance Card* is pretty full. Sweet Lady is out of Rehab and adjusting to being back at her place. We spent several days last week making the rounds with all her physicians and out patient physical therapy will be starting next week. I was a little overwhelmed when I heard she was going to have to go out for therapy but then I had an unsolicited offer to get her to therapy any time I needed help. That was such a provision from the Lord and an offer I will probably accept. She is doing really well back in her home and it makes me smile to see her sitting in her favorite chair in the lobby when I walk in.

We decided with all this going on, it would be a nice to time to remodel our downstairs bathroom. Don't even ask me what we were thinking....really what were we thinking! We are at a point of no return though, the commode has been removed. This is a project that's going to have to get finished in a timely manner, walking up steps for the bathroom is a little inconvenient. On a positive note, we are getting that extra exercise we talked about getting after the holidays. Again, I ask, what were we thinking??!!

Our emotions have been all over the place following my husband's mom's death, it has surprised us. We went through the viewing and funeral with little emotion, we took care of the initial business and then went immediately home. Once home, and after things started to settle a bit, the reality and finality of it all hit us. We are still wading through those waters, and I think will be there a long time as we continue to resolve things that need to be settled.

We have been blown away by the care we have received from the body of Christ. Several times in the last week, it came in the form of that shoulder I needed to cry on or that nugget of truth I needed to be reminded of.  I've learned how valuable a silent hug can be and how words are not always necessary.

I love the Psalms and one that is a favorite of mine is Psalm 16, Verses 5-8 state
"Lord you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance. I will praise the Lord, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me. I keep my eyes always on the Lord. With him at my right hand, I will not be shaken" (italics, mine)

Like I said before we are still wading through some uncertain waters but remembering he is at our right hand while we wade through it, so we will not be shaken.

Many Mercies

I had a moment in my oh too busy week and thought it would be a good time to reflect on how faithful God has been to us the last couple of days. Maybe it will encourage you as you are walking through something difficult.

I knew last week was going to be busy. I had a couple of appointments, a medical procedure scheduled and Sweet Lady was finally given a discharge date, it was for Friday.  When our Ladies Group met the week before I asked them to pray that I would rest in the Lord and trust him for all the details ahead of me and that I wouldn't be tempted to be anxious. That's my default when I have a lot of things going on at once. I left the meeting feeling encouraged and ready to face the week and the tasks ahead of me.

A couple of days later we received the call no one wants to receive. My Mother in law had passed away

The morning we received the news we spent it tying things together, rearranging some things, canceling others. Our Care Group Leaders stopped by to see what they could do to help, and to pray with us. It meant so much to us. It also gave us a chance to talk about how God had met us in other times of need, which helped to build our faith for the week ahead.

My mother in law lived a long life, she was 94. Her desire was to stay in her home, till the end of her days, she was able to do that. We were sad at her loss but thankful that she was able to live as she wanted.

My emotions are all jumbled right now. I'm amazed at the mercies God has provided during this time on one hand but still trying to process the loss. Sweet Lady was discharged Friday, so our schedules are going to remain full as we take care of her needs and multiple appointments that have to be made, a blessing in disguise.

They are both gone now and a chapter in our lives has now closed. I know the Lord will continue to be faithful and will have fresh mercies every morning.

Comfort Those That Mourn

A Prayer in Response to the Newtown, CT Tragedy

This prayer was written yesterday by Scotty Smith after the tragic events in Newtown:

Dear Lord Jesus, we abandon ourselves to you tonight—we come running with our tears and our fears, our anger and our anguish, our lament and our longings. We collapse in your presence, with the assurance of your welcome, needing the mercies of your heart.

Some stories are just too much for us to absorb; some evil just too great to conceive; some losses  beyond all measurability. We need your tears and your strength tonight. That you wept outside the tomb of a beloved friend frees us to groan and mourn; that you conquered his death with yours, frees us to hope and wait.

But we turn our thoughts from ourselves to the families who have suffered an unconscionable violation of heart and all sensibilities. Bring your presence to bear, Lord Jesus, by your Spirit and through your people. May your servants weep with those who weep and wail with those who wail. Extend your tear wiping hand—reach into this great tragedy with an even greater grace.

We cry out on behalf of the children of Newtown, those most directly affected by this evil, and for children throughout our country and the world, whose little hearts are reeling with fear and terror. Give parents wisdom and kindness, as they seek to love their children well, this night and in the coming days. Raise up gifted counselors and care givers to serve those most traumatized.

Lastly, Lord Jesus, we cry out with a loud voice, How long, O, Lord? How long before you return to eradicate all evil, redeem all tragedies, and make all things new? How long, O, Lord, how long? Your Bride weeps and waits for you. In your merciful and mighty name we pray.


"Blessed are those that mourn, for they will be comforted"  Matthew 5:4
Comfort those that are mourning right now Lord Jesus