Snow Bound

We don't have snow often but when we do it shuts the city down. The weather people had been hinting at snow all week, but we tend to take all predictions of snow with a grain of salt, most of the time the warnings of impending frozen white precipitation never materialize, this however; wasn't the case last Saturday. Friday night it sleeted for about two hours, before it started snowing and then snowed all day Saturday. The temperatures then dropped and have stayed below freezing since. We have a few snow plows in the city but not enough to plow all the roads, mostly the snow melts on the streets when the weather warms up, so it could take days to clear things up. We are a Beach Town, not a Ski Resort, so we don't do snow well. (and we had a lot of snow)

Schools have been off, church was cancelled, our BSF was cancelled and many businesses were closed yesterday (husband did not have to go into work) Things are beginning to look up today, the temps will be above freezing, lots of places will be open at noon but conditions are still bad and if you don't HAVE to go out you need to stay home. (husband did go to work today, but late)

The "forced" home confinement has been good, I've tackled tasks that needed to be done around the house. I am still in the downsizing mind set, which means I need to clean out closets and drawers. We have been debating for about eighteen months on whether to move from our home or remodel to suit our needs as we age. We are leaning very heavily on the move option at this time, which means cleaning things out. Something that needs to be done regardless.

I'm getting a little "Cabin Fever" at this point, today will be day four at home. You don't realize how much running around you do until you can't. I am out doing things that need to be done several times a week.

The truth is, I need these "breaks", I think we all do. We are all so busy, with lists of things to do and places to be. God's plan can get lost in midst of all of it, at least in my life.

I am tending to household tasks during this time but I am also using this time physically and spiritually recharge. Trying to look at this time as a gift, sovereignly orchestrated by the Lord for me.

The Necessity of Being Still

I have difficulty with "quiet"...it's something I realized several years ago. In contrast,  I do "busy" well. (at least it seems like I do in the short term) I fill my days with things that need to be done, errands, appointments and an occasional lunch or coffee with a friend.

"Busy" can be challenging though. When I'm busy I don't always find time to eat, or I'm grabbing a quick bite on the run. That's okay every now and then, but if you do it for any length of time you begin to run down physically. It has the same spiritual application.

"Busy" has snuck up on me again, squeezing out "quiet".  I have felt it physically, but even more so spiritually and frankly it's hard to do battle when you've been  so busy that you don't feed yourself properly. Spiritually, I've been grabbing "quick bites" and relying on stored truths.

There are truths I have stored up over the years, that I have been able to use when I've been in the middle of one of "those" conversations that only I can hear, (you know the type I'm talking about)

The internal conversations that focus on mistakes, regrets, sin, failure and the what if''s. Those "conversations" can leave me a little discouraged, until I get to the place of stored truth. Like God is on the throne, he is ruling and reigning over all things, he is sovereign over all, he works all things for good.

I know I need a more substantial diet than the "quick bites" I've been getting. Coincidently our ladies ministry will be going through the book of Romans...what do you think, does it sound like a good place to get fed.

My Days Are In His Hands

Apparently oversized Wellingtons are not the best footwear  for trudging through snow, or perhaps I am not used to walking in the slippery white stuff. (wait, it's not meant to be walked in right?) At any rate, I managed to strain my back during one of my snow adventures last week.  I knew snow was meant to be admired from the warmth of my cozy home, but I was compelled to experience it up close and personal and am now paying the price for my excursion.

I am still able to get around,  but have been slowed down considerably, AND it's taking longer to get better than I would like. Throwing my back out did not fit into MY plans and I am finding that I am more than a little annoyed about it. The truth is I have been really frustrated, and just plain irritated that this happened and my attitude has reflected as much. We had two quiet homebound days last week because the snow shut everything down, but now I had things to do. I had MY plans!

The Lord was faithful to remind me that "my times are in your hands" Psalm 31:15

If this is true, and I believe it to be so, then this bump in the road is part of his plan. After I got to a point of surrender, I was able to think of things that I could be thankful for, in the midst of this newest dilemma.... my husband was home, he was able to drive me,  and I was able to get a short notice physical therapy visit, and I have remained mobile. (not always the case in the past)

I am sure I will have to remind myself again, and again that my times are in his hands (I am sure several more times today, at least) but for now I am content knowing that he is in control.

On Hearing And Responding

I was walking along a footpath, when I heard the snap of a twig in the brush. I stopped for a moment and looked to see if anything was there, but all I saw was brush. I heard another snap, so I decided to get my camera ready, just in case something was there...within a minute she popped out.

Had it not been quiet I would never had heard that twig snap, had I not taken my camera out I would have missed the shot. Made me think a little...is the "noise" in my life making it hard for me to hear (perhaps some decluttering needed) and when I do hear am I responding? Just something I had to ask myself this morning and all because God put a deer in my path today.

Time to Be Still

My job continues, but looks totally different than it did. I am working on an as needed basis and was told that with budget concerns I probably would not be working much...I had no problem with that, I felt like the Lord wanted me to be willing to let the job go and I had. The next week I was told I could work as much as I wanted to in July and I was trained to do another job in my department, so I could be available in that position if needed. I have been working less (by choice) and I have been able to decide when I work, including taking time off  time when I need to.

I saw this as temporary, every indication I had gotten from my manager was this was temporary....but now it looks like it could last awhile and I am left a little perplexed. What am I supposed to be doing? I thought the job was ending or at the very least be limited. I don't mind the job, the pressure is now gone and I have flexibility that I wanted, but is this what God had in mind all the while,was it just the willingness to let the job go? Do I continue where I am at or is there another direction that God has for me, I feel like I am at a crossroads of sorts and need to hear from God.

 "Be still and know that I am God" Psalm 46:10

Husband is out of town on business...I am with him. He is gone all day working, I am alone without a schedule. This is something that is quite foreign to me, (no schedule) but its a good thing. I have been encouraged by friends to use this time away to be still before the Lord, to let family handle things at home and to turn off my cell phone..(probably can't do that)  I have planned to do some reading (I brought some much neglected books) some photography...it is a beautiful place and yes I have planned to be still.

In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice, in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation  Psalm 5:3

Day Alone

My husband is helping my son move this weekend, so I found myself not only alone but unable to go outside  and work in the garden because the temperature was well over 100 degrees. What to do? My schedule is usually pretty full, I know, kids are grown, so what's up with that? I don't know, I seem to have a knack for filling up my "white space"

I felt like I needed to use the time that my husband is gone to slow down, no running around, a time to "be still"

So today was a day of just hanging out. I got to catch up on some reading, actually a lot of reading. I spent most of my day reading various books.(I always seem to have more than one going) Started a new book by Elyse Fitzpatrick; Because He Loves Me.

My neighbor left some tomatoes on my front porch, I mixed them up with avocado, sprinkled the whole thing with cheese and a side of tortilla chips and and called it dinner.

Then more reading, a little puttering around the house, but basically a very low key day, one without noise(believe it or not no IPod today)

It has been nice to slow down. Tomorrow will be a little different, there will be church in the morning and then I will stop by and see Sweet Lady, maybe we will get some ice cream together. The rest of the day will be much like today. I miss my husband (he made it safely) but I have also enjoyed my time alone, it has been a time to get recharged, rested.. I think we all have a hard time slowing down, don't you?

Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you  Psalm 63:3

A Lovely Retreat

  

Home again, although this was a  business trip for my husband, our time away from home was quite enjoyable. While my husband was in meetings during the day I would hop on the metro and head to the museums. I had no particular agenda, so with camera in hand I would get off at the Smithsonian exit and begin walking

Not a cloud in the sky, but it was hot!

 

World War 2 Memorial

A great place to escape the heat

The Lone Sailor at the Navy Memorial

I saw the trip as a little gift from God. I had time to sit and read (without worrying about laundry or dishes that needed done) and listen to my IPod, I have various teaching and sermons downloaded (never leave home without it) Definitely some much needed feeding of the soul going on. Came back refreshed and relaxed. And there was a little surprise waiting for us when we got back, our newest grandchild, pictures to come

"Give thanks to the Lord for he is good his love endures forever"  Psalm 107:1

Finding A Quiet Place of Rest

When I saw this bench, I thought to myself what a beautiful place to sit and rest. We  all need that place, a quiet place of rest. One of the "benefits" of getting sick was getting plucked out of my busy life and being forced given the opportunity to rest before the Lord.

My quiet place of rest during those months was a worn out recliner. I had stacks of books on one side and my laptop on the other. With distractions at a minimal, I was able to drink deeply into the word of God. I gained a new appreciation for how important it was to spend time with the Lord each day. (I wouldn't trade those days for anything)

Life beginning to return to normal, I am back at work, I have household responsibilities clamoring for my attention and errands that need to be done. Previously I was a person who loved to fill her "white space" with all kinds of activities, if it sounded good, I did it, very seldom did I seek the Lord in my choices.

I have now become very intentional. I am seeking the Lord's guidance when I make decisions concerning my schedule. Could my time be better spent in some instances? Remember my children are grown, so I don't have that responsibility.

One of the things the Lord has laid on my heart was to put him in my schedule...beyond my regular quiet time. Find a quiet place on a regular basis that I could spend an extended period of time before him, praying, reading, listening. I am in a season of life that I can do this...I have no excuse not to. I don't want status quo...I don't want to pick up my life where I left off...I want much more.

"Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers. But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers." Psalm 1:1-3

Be Still

Well tomorrow was the day I was supposed to go back to work and because of the trouble with my eye I felt it best to delay my return, at least until after I see the eye doctor tomorrow. I had actually gotten to the point where I was ready, so this has been pretty frustrating. I think if there was any word that could describe my mental state the last few days it would be discouraged. I think it.s all about expectations...... my expectations are not being met....plain and simple! I expected to be at a certain point physically by this time. I could see the frustrations playing out in how my husband and I were relating to each other yesterday....not always pretty. I have been through so much, I saw first hand  God's faithfulness, his care for me.....the only thing that has changed is my situation...... he has not changed! Obviously I still have an agenda, I am not trusting God, still leaning on my own understanding. So what's next.....not really sure. Doctor should be able to tell me something tomorrow, will know if I will be able to go back to work anytime soon. The scripture the Lord keeps bringing to my memory is this...Be still and know that I am God....I need to stop fretting, worrying about what tomorrow will bring and just focus on what His "truths" are. Drawing nearer to Him

"Be still and know that I am God"  Psalm 46:10