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Wednesday, September 14, 2011

His Plan


September is doctor month for me. I am still on an every three month schedule for my surgeon and oncologist. When the time rolls around for the appointments to happen we go through a little bit of anxiety in our house, is it because we don't trust God with our lives's? I do trust him, but with some things it's harder.  I know each one of you can relate to this on some level. We all have things in our life that are harder to trust God with than others.

So my two appointments are behind me, but I m not done yet. I have to have a repeat MRI, nothing new has been found, this was something they had recommended last June, I just didn't know about it, and it sounds like something I will be having done on a regular basis. Ironic because this was exactly what I was trying to avoid when I made treatment decisions last fall.

So meaning no disrespect, but the Lord and I have been having this conversation the last couple of days. I was down right honest about my fustration, dissappointment. What he has been speaking to me is this...You had your plan but this is the path I want you to walk. You still want control of this situation but I want you to trust in me.

So that's my life right now, oh and least I forget to mention they also want me to see an endocrinlogist and a gastroenterolgist sometime in the near future.

Like I said earlier we all have things in our live's that we find it harder to trust God with, mine just happens to be health issues. This blog won't dwell on what is going on with me physically, there is too much life happening that's far more interesting, but when he shows me something about myself as I walk this path I'll open the curtains to let you take a peek.

He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord  Psalm 112:7


12 comments:

LDH said...

Your post was worded so perfectly and touches many hearts and many situations. I love the verse you ended with. Thank you the peek into your lessons.

Debbie said...

Good morning! I can sooo relate to the lessons you are working with here as I have had MANY of the same ones. Having suffered with anxiety (as has most of my brothers and sisters) a great deal of my life, health issues have always been particularly hard area to just trust and let the Lord have complete control. I think that was why when I was going through my breast cancer surgery etc., it was soo unbelievable the peace that I experienced. It could have only been coming from Him. On my own I don't know if I could have ever born it. I just put my check up behind me again last month. I am on a every 6 month checkup. And yes, I begin sweating it out a few weeks in advance. I LOVE that we can go to Him and tell Him just how we are feeling, and He sooo understands and gets us and walks us through. Praying all goes well for you! HUGS, Debbie

WhiteStone said...

Joshua 1:9 is a good verse. I was reminded of it by a family member this week.

Janette@Janette's Sage said...

Oh hugs...prayers and hear your heart. We each have areas...your is health, mine is financial provision...each have our own journey.

I will be praying for you as you continue down this journey and as you see your Loving Father holding you close during these times.

Peggy said...

I can certainly relate to what you said about some things are harder to trust God with than others. He keeps trying to teach me to give up all the control and trying to fix things myself and just surender it all to Him. Thanks for the reminder and prayers to you as you go through these tests.

Debbie said...

He keeps telling me the same thing. I'm so grateful that I serve a very patient God, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. A lesser god would never have the patience with me that He does and would want to pound me. Maybe our God does too, but he never shows it.

I relate very much.
I pray that every additional test and every visit brings positive news and encouragement.

Trisha said...

Maryann,
I continue to pray for you, and I pray God will bless you with more and more peace as the days go on. How true it is that some lessons are so much harder than others.I hug you in my heart.

Petra said...

Oh my, I will pray for you! I will pray that God would bless you with more faith and trust and peace and rest. You're so right, we all have situations, some of which are so hard, over which we still want control because we wish them to end the way we think they should. And God makes us wait because He so wants us! But in order to have all of us, we must let go of all else and trust Him completely. Blessings!

Sassy Granny ... said...

I have a piece of etched glass artwork in my window, just above my sink. It reminds me every day: "If God has brought you to it, He will bring you through it." Oh how quickly I forget this at times.

I pray your health is restored completely, even as I thank God for your honesty in sharing the challenge.

nancyspoint said...

I know what you mean about having trouble trusting. I also understand about the anxiety over the appts and tests. Ugh. It's a new way of living isn't it? I'm still trying to figure it all out. Good luck with your appts.

no spring chicken said...

Perhaps we'll not dwell on your health here, but you definitely need to keep us up to date. That's how we know how to pray. That's what friends/sisters in Christ do...

Blessings, Debbie

elaine @ peace for the journey said...

I just returned to my surgeon this week. I go see him every six months. As for the oncologist, I go every 3 months but he never does anything. Nothing. No blood work. It's left me so confused, that I had my surgeon refer me for a second opinion with another oncologist. It seems as if every dr. has a preference for follow-up care. As for mine, I think I'm being "under" doctored if that's possible. Would love to know more about your plan.

Hope your emotions are keeping in check. Mine have been all over the map!

peace~elaine