Friday, March 18, 2011

Making Progress

Continue to recover from the "bug" I had picked up this week.  My doctor did eventually convince me to get into her office. Confirmed with blood work what I already knew, I had something viral going on. Gave me another shot of phenergan and I was on my way, oh and one other minor detail, I also have thrush....lovely! I knew my mouth felt kind of weird but never even considered thrush, never bothered looking inside my mouth!! Did I mention I was a nurse, I should know about these things!
I am eating again, light stuff like eggs, toast, crackers and apples, so am getting back to normal.

Beautiful day outside, unusually warm for this time of year. Felt well enough to do some indoor gardening. I had seeds on my kitchen table that were just waiting to be planted. Just the activity I felt up to. Dug out some peat pellets from the garage, moistened them with water and planted some herbs. This is the second batch I have planted, the first seeds are starting to sprout. Love that I can start thinking of other things besides breast cancer and which doctor appointment I have next!

Starting a new series on the book of Jonah at our church soon, we have been encouraged to read "Surprised by Grace" by Tullian Tchividjian in preparation for the series. Some books can take time to read, not that they are long but they are full of truths that need to be considered before you move on. This is going to be one of those books. I came across an excerpt today that had a lot of truth in it, something I had to think about.

"Submitting self to God is the only real freedom, because the deepest slavery is self-dependence, self-reliance. When you live your life believing that everything (family, finances, relationships, career) depends primarily on you, you're enslaved to your strengths and weaknesses. You're trying to be your own savior. Freedom comes when we start trusting in God's abilities and wisdom instead of our own. Real life begins when we transfer our trust from our own efforts to the efforts of Christ"

Now I will say I believe God is in control of my life, I am just along for the ride, but my responses betray me. Breast cancer has really brought this issue I have with control into the light of day. How many times in the last several months have I had to remind myself, he is the potter I am the clay, he is God I am not. Lord continues to do a work in my heart, cancer, vehicle God using to change me.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways declares the Lord"  Isaiah 55:8

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