Thinking Clearly

I had to make some decisions today about work. I have gotten several emails from my boss asking when I would be coming back. I tried to keep her updated without really committing but it was no longer working. She has been more than supportive, and I understood, decision made, my goal is to try to go back April 5th. This time, unlike last, I will start off with partial days. I did not anticipate the fatigue last time, lesson learned. One more decision, I would not work at home prior to coming back. I had said I would earlier....because.... why?? The more I started thinking about it the more I realized that it was not in my best interest. What was I trying to prove? I have enough sick time to cover me for six more weeks if needed, so it wasn't a financially based decision. I had said yes because I wanted to be seen as a team player, someone who could be counted on. OK, I am not saying helping out is a bad thing... but... doing work at home, is not going to be helpful to me, I don't need the extra pessure that would be involved with that. After cancer, work was supposed to be down on the priority list...remember? I may be late to the party but at least I finally started thinking clearly.

I have about 12 days to get moving. First thing on the list, try to get dressed before noon....I ditched the sweats yesterday so at least I am in "real" clothes again. Next thing would be to try to walk each day. Walked a couple of blocks yesterday, turned around when I got tired, problem was..still had a couple of blocks till I got home...next time...turn back before you get tired. I did take a drive today to the post office...you would have thought I could have done something a little more fun but it was a necessary errand. My endurance is bad but thankfully all the stomach issues are behind me. Hopefully each day will be better and I can continue to do more.

Goal is set, we shall see what happens, willing to take each day as it comes, willing to hold my plans loosely.

"Trust the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight"  Proverbs  3: 5-6